So a week ago, I got this phone call from this girl who wanted me to meet up with her to read a scene for her reel. She said that she got my headshot from an audition I had done about two or three weeks ago for this guy auditioning me for his Director's reel who thought I'd be great for her. I think I know what she's talking about, but now that I've gone through all this shit, who fucking knows.
I assumed that she was another director who wanted to get material for her director's reel, because she didn't really say anything to the contrary. I agreed to meet up with her for coffee to read the scene a couple days later.
So I like to
I get to the coffee shop with my sides (from a Grey's Anatomy scene) and a headshot/resume, order some iced tea, and chill out. Out of the corner of my eye, I see someone with a similar side reading with this girl outside the window. So I guess she was trying out different people and seeing who she wanted. Cool beans, that works.
So the other actor leaves, and I make eye contact and smile to the girl I think is the director...but she kinda looks away. Okay. I guess...I was wrong? I conveniently push my headshot to the top of my papers, so whoever the director ends up being can find me.
After a little bit, I'm about to text her, when the girl who I thought was/wasn't the director comes up to me. Oh hello! Cool, found you.
We start talking...and it becomes clear after I ask her if she's part of a school or if this is just for her reel that she's an actor. Oops. My bad.
And it all clicks..oh shit, it's the stunt girl/actor.
So we read the scene, and it goes pretty well. We read it again.
And she starts talking about how her manager wants her to film some scenes for her reel. He actually calls her while we're talking, and she tells me that he's really hands on about her career. Which sounds like a good quality to have in a manager. I mean, I'd love someone to work with me and drive me in the right direction.
We end the meeting, and I apologize for thinking she was a director and we kinda laugh about it. We actually really clicked, I think. And then, before I leave, she tells me:
"Oh, I'll send your headshot and information to my manager."
What? Awesome!
I thank her, and I leave feeling pretty good about myself.
A couple days later, I get a phone call from her saying that her manager really wants to meet with me, and she gives me his number and information.
YES. This is awesome. I was feeling pretty good about myself. I mean, shoot, I might have some good representation soon!
So I call...and it goes straight to voicemail. Which sort of puts me off balance, but I leave a message telling him that his client had called me, and that I'd love to meet with him, etc.
I end up missing his call. Shit. So I call him back ASAP...but it's the same fucking voicemail thing.
Finally, he ends up calling back and I answer.
I wish I could remember everything, but this phone call was literally like 30 minutes long. As were the other couple times he called.
We start talking...and it becomes clear, as he repeats like 50 times, that he's a "no bullshit" kind of guy. Alright, that can be good.
He tells me he has a ton of friends in the top of businesses, like CAA, Liongate, Dreamworks, etc. That he can get me to meet with casting directors for shows that I would be a fit for.
He tells me that he needs to know that I'm not going to let him down, that there's nothing about me that could possibly fuck shit up.
Kay.
But then he starts telling me that he saw my facebook, and that there's shit on there I need to get rid of, that no one would cast me with the shit I have on there.
I pause and think to myself...my facebook's private. No one can see shit, except maybe my interests and favorite music or something.
But I just agree anyway, and say that I'll clean it up.
He also asks me if I got his e-mail. That his "assistant" sent me his e-mail and private phone number to contact him. (I found this later in my junk mail. FIRST CLUE. My e-mail knew before I did.)
He tells me to put everything I had planned today aside, and sit down and write him a bio about myself. He said he needed to know everything: boyfriends, measurements, cousins, drugs, relationships...everything that could help him understand me and better find roles for me. He wanted to know that I could follow directions, so he said to put that shit in one e-mail, and in the other one put 3-4 actresses I liked, 2-3 shows I liked, and actors with similar acting styles. He wanted me to call him before I sent it tonight.
Alright. Cool. I can do this.
I wanted to show that I was a no bullshit type of girl. That I wasn't afraid of anything in my past, and I was good at following directions.
So I write it out. Everything. From my days in school in France, my awkward times, my parents, my ex boyfriends, my bad times, my surgery, my boyfriend. I wanted him to know that I wasn't fucking around and that I was on the same road that he wanted to put me on. There was shit on there I think some of my close friends don't know. But I wanted him to know I was real as fuck, I've been through shit, and I bring everything I got to my acting.
I wrote that I loved Kristen Wiig, Emma Stone, and Kate Winslet: everything I loved about them. It was hard to actually pinpoint who I thought my acting style was like...I don't really see myself like that, but I said Jennifer Lawrence. And give some detailed explanation of why. My favorite shows, which I thought were really smart choices.
I send the e-mail: it took me almost 4 hours to type out everything.
He sends me e-mail responses to each of them, saying he appreciated my honesty, he'll review everything and talk to me tomorrow.
Cool beans.
The next day he calls me. He says he read everything, appreciated my honesty, said that there was some pretty deep shit in there and that he could tell I was an interesting person...
...and then he suddenly swings out:
"Did you get my e-mails?"
Um. Yeah, I did.
"Why didn't you reply?"
What...there was nothing to reply to...what the fuck.
"Communication is key. You can't fuck that up."
Uh. Kay.
He says there are some things that worry him in my bio.
Well, fuck, you said everything.
He spurts out a lot of "I know what to do with you, if you let me do it." and basically says he has the connections to make me a part of the best actresses in LA. Like over and over. With a lot of stories about how he's gotten auditions for feature films for his clients, and putting them in auditions with Amanda Seyfried, and lessons with the on-set acting coaches of Hillary Swank, etc.
And now this is where I started to not like this shit.
He started talking about my boyfriend. How he was bringing me down, how he's just a kid, and basically how I should break up with the guy.
And he starts bringing up shit that I wrote about and analyzing me psychologically.
He started using shit that I typed up for him, and reeling me into him.
Dude. No.
And he brings up this New York trip I'm going on in a couple weeks.
He asks me how long I'm going to be gone for.
"Um, 4 or 5 days."
"That's...that's too long. I wish I had met you before you scheduled that."
Um. I'm filming shit in NY, that's why I'm going. I'm filming a sizzle reel for a pilot that's being shipped around to companies like ABC and NBC, so what the fuck.
And then he basically starts putting down everything I've done so far...that all the student film shit I've been doing is crap, that this New York thing is bullshit...
I started arguing with him back when he mentioned my boyfriend, and now I was really pissed.
He also told me I wasn't watching enough TV...because I happened not to watch The Sopranos (WHICH ISNT ON TV ANYMORE) and Boardwalk Empire. Like getting mad at me because I wasn't doing this shit.
For the record, I watch TV, thanks. And if I ever got an audition for a TV series, I would watch the shit out of it before auditioning because I'm smart about it.
Speaking about research, this guy didn't have ANY information on him. None. His business didn't show up anywhere, except on IMDB Pro, where he was repping 7 other people (who honestly, weren't really doing a whole lot...for all the "connections" he had, it clearly wasn't working out for them).
He started talking about how I had never had a real audition for anything.
And I told him I actually had auditioned for some TV shows, and kind of got a callback for one of them...
AND HE STILL PUT THAT DOWN.
Now I'm getting pissed.
I also mentioned, because he kept on saying he wanted to put me in serious, dramatic shit, that I really loved comedy and that was a real part of my life I didn't want to let go.
And he told he had a girl like me who wanted to do comedy, but gave her the breakdowns for roles in that genre, and there were 0 match ups for her.
Which. I'm pretty sure is bullshit.
He brings up the boyfriend thing. AGAIN. What the fuck dude, do you want to be my boyfriend or something?
He says things like, "If you're shooting for 3 months in Canada, is he going to tell you to stay? If I send you for kickboxing classes, is he going to be mad and not want you to go?"
Um. Yeah I think he'd be stoked for me and come out to visit me if he can get a few days off.
AND he kept saying he wanted me to do all these workshops and classes and shit...dude, that's a whole lot of money. I'm not going to do 7 classes at a time, sorry, I don't even have time to do one right now.
He kept repeating that he could make me really good, if I let him do his thing and I listened to him. Which immediately, I didn't like...I don't really feel like being turned into something I'm not.
This was kinda split into two phonecalls that day. But in the first he said he wanted me to find 3 monologues, film them, and send them to him by the end of the day. The second call was around 2:30, when I was about to film everything, and lasted til about 3:30.
So at the end of this one, he was like:
"I want the monologues by 5:00, okay?"
Uh.
"Well, I mean, I was working on them when you called...I'm just not sure with uploading time, and editing, if that's gonna-"
"Just get it done. I told you this morning. Just do it."
And he hangs up.
What. The fuck.
So I'm staring at the monologues, not sure what the fuck to do.
I google his e-mail, and find this girl who used to be represented by him and I send her a facebook message asking why she dumped him. She never responds though.
I call Sam. And I tell him about everything that just happened. And he tells me that after asking his dad and a couple other people, that this guy was bullshit and that everything he was saying was just wrong.
And I just start crying. Bawling.
I don't know why, exactly. I think part of me was scared that this would be the only way I could actually do this. Was I going to have to give up everything I loved and thought I was good at to fit in some fucking mold? Was I going to have to give up my friends and family to do this? Would I ever get anyone else to want to represent me or help me succeed?
I had to end this shit, it had already gone way too far. I knew this was bad news, and whether or not it would get me anything positive, it clearly wasn't the right choice.
So my boyfriend, who apparently I was supposed to dump, helped me write the e-mail: straight, to the point, nothing he could attack, no emotional phrases. I was wary sending it...seriously, part of me still wanted it to be right.
And I sent it.
And on my boyfriend's advice, I filled up a glass of white wine with mango, ran a bubble bath, and watch the Descendants.
And turned off my phone.
I looked back on everything that had happened...even from the beginning, the actress that I met up with looked kinda scared and little unbalanced. And how exactly did they get my information again?? And why was there absolutely NO information, no pictures or anything, on this guy? I'm not even sure his business was registered.
He sent me this later on:
Hey, knock knock...
Go fuck yourself.
I've been working since I got here. I've done at least 12 different projects in 3 months, that's a project a week. I'm going to have a fucking kick ass reel when all my shit comes back to me in around 3-4 weeks or so, and you bet your ass I'm gonna be ready to bring it next pilot season.
The funny thing is, I had that bad gut feeling as soon as I heard his voice. And I should've listened to it earlier, but I'm glad I shut things down when I did.
A manager isn't supposed to make you feel like shit. And this guy failed in the first 24 hrs.
Honestly...what's gotten me work is my relationships with people I meet. I've met a lot of cool, real (not this douchebag's "real") people who want to do work and who I've clicked with, who think I don't suck or have to take kickboxing classes. And that's been a really good force in my career.
LISTEN TO YOUR GUT.
It knows what's going to work for you.
And don't let some dick tell you what you're not doing right. Because you know better than anyone what makes you happy.
And a tell-tale sign someone's bad for you:
If they say "I hear you" 10 times in a row for dramatic effect.
Cuz they probably don't.
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